Have you ever YELLED at God?

As a PK (pastor’s kid), I was told to never get angry at God… I remember distinctly, one cold, wintery, southern Manitoba evening walking along side of the highway near the Seminary I was attending. I was in the place spiritually and mentally where from my heart I screamed, “GOD, WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH MY LIFE??”

As more than 25 years have passed since that evening, I think I am wiser to the ways of God, but I am still left to wonder the “whys” of life. Why has my life taken the convoluted journey that it has? Why have there been, from my perspective, more than my share of troubles? Granted many of these troubles were self-inflicted due to some of the dumb choices I made, but not all of them. Is God punishing or correcting?

It is amazing that these same questions are asked on a daily basis by the people I encounter on a regular basis. More than thirty-five years ago, as a nursing orderly, I saw many people come into the hospital with “life changing” injuries as a result of nothing they have done. As a counsellor with Teen Challenge Saskatchewan, I encountered hundreds of men who made unhealthy choices which lead to “life altering” consequences and even death. As a Pastor of Care, I engaged those with questions of God’s grace and forgiveness. “If God is a loving God and our protector, why disease and premature death; why family breakups; why anxiety and depression; why do adult children stray from the faith . . .”

Prior to their permanent closure in 2020, I was the only male counsellor at Christian Counselling Services in Saskatoon. My areas of focus were mental health, marriage and family concerns, men’s issues, addictions and grief/loss. I share with my clients that no life experience should be looked at as a waste. Many of the struggles that clients present have been those that I have either encountered personally or have walked alongside someone who needs a listening heart.

My approach to counselling is one where life is filtered through the Word of God. The Holy Spirit, who knows my clients better than they know themselves, is the Counsellor. Although my professional title is “counsellor,” I see my role as “one who walks with and disciples.

We are all on this earth journey together and should my troubles or hurts or pain help me connect to a wounded heart, then my journey has been worth it. I look forward in continuing my calling to ministry by founding Amazing Grace Counselling, where I can serve the Lord with thankfulness for all I have experienced; the good and the not-so-good.”